I need him and he needs me
by Fleeting.Eternal.Art
Summary: Not sure where I'm going with this... TylerxJack...Jack wants Tyler, Jack needs Tyler, but Tyler won't let him get close.
1. Chapter 1

His name is Tyler. Tyler Durden.  
>"Hey Tyler." I say. We're sitting outside on the curb, drinking beers. The whole world stares at the blood caked on our faces.<br>"What?" He takes the last swig of his beer and tosses it into whatever black abyss it happens to fall in. The loud sound of glass crashing reminds me that we're alone. I take a deep breath.  
>I am Jack's hope.<br>"We're close right? Like you an me?"  
>He snorts. "Yeah, I guess."<br>"You guess?" I feel my mouth curve down slightly. He lies down on the soft earth behind him.  
>"Lie down with me." He says. How can I say no? So I lie down. He always finds ways to ignore my questions.<br>We stare up at the black sky. There are no stars tonight.  
>"Hey Tyler." I say again. "I have to tell you something."<br>He grins a little. "The sky's so polluted that we can't see the stars? That, my friend, is a result of man kind destroying the world."  
>"No. Will you let me finish? I l-"<br>"There's so much mayhem in the world. Guys like us? We're calm. Calm as hin-"  
>I cut him off with a kiss. "I love you, Tyler."<br>He smiles his Tyler smile. "You know, there was kinda a sick desperation in your kiss."  
>I just stare at him. "It's cold. We oughta get inside."<br>I am Jack's broken heart.  
>As I get off the dirt, Tyler grabs my hand. "No, wait."<br>I pull my hand away. "I'm tired of the bullshit, Tyler! I'm done here." I begin to walk towards the house.  
>"We're not done until I say we're done." He growls. He pulls me into a forceful kiss. How can I say no? So I kiss him.<br>"We're done." He walks into the house and leaves me outside, all alone with not even the stars to illuminate my way.  
>He just said we're done.<br>Fuck.

It's morning again. I'm in bed. I guess he came back for me.  
>Back to my regular 8 to 5 job. I dress in my white shirt from two days ago even though it has blood on it. 'It's Tyler's blood.' I think to myself, smiling.<br>When I go into the kitchen, I expect to see Tyler drinking coffee and waiting for me with that Tyler smile of his. Instead, I see a shirtless blonde-MY shirtless blonde pushing a woman out the door. As she leaves, she yells "Atleast the sex was great!"  
>I am Jack's raging jealousy.<br>"3 minutes," He says without looking at my face. I have 3 minutes to get to work. I'm late.  
>"You fucked her. I told you I….and you fuck her."<br>He grabs a cup that's been sitting on the counter for awhile. He sniffs at it and I briefly wonder if it's the vinegar he used on my hand.  
>"You're a wreck. Have you looked at yourself in the mirror? There's blood on your shirt."<br>I smile at him as I head out the door.  
>"It's your blood, Tyler. That's why I'm wearing it."<p>

Tyler doesn't want me. Tyler doesn't need me.  
>I'll find my own fight club tonight. I don't need Tyler.<br>So instead of going to fight club, I go on Madison Avenue: home of the Armageddon of the world.  
>Just kidding. But it does get pretty wild down there. Gangs, dealers, prostitutes, you name it.<br>The pathetic scum of the world.  
>"But we are the all singing, all dancing crap of the world." A little voice inside of me reminds.<br>I am God's unwanted child.  
>I am Tyler's unwanted lover.<br>I am Jack's sense of rejection.

The little moans coming from the youth below me bring me back to reality. I keep fazing in and out. I don't even know if I'm awake anymore.

I faze in again. The youth smiles at me. He pecks my cheek and leaves. I'm standing in front of the house.  
>I don't know when I got to bed.<p>

"Where the fuck where you last night?" spits Tyler angrily.  
>I must have had a look of bliss on my face because the next thing I knew, his fist connected with my jaw and I was on the floor.<br>"I need you, man." He says softly.  
>"I was with someone else." I fade out. I don't remember what happened after that.<br>When I fade in again, Tyler's fucking Marla.  
>"OH TYLER!" she yells.<br>He moans my name.  
>Tyler loves me.<br>Tyler needs me.  
>And I, I need Tyler too.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Marla. That little slut. She's taking him from me.  
>She's a fucking tumor. One of the ones that the doctors keep destroying and destroying ,but they keep coming back.<br>Fight Club is the only connection I still have with Tyler. It is the only time he looks at me, the only time he acknowledges my existence. I take out all my anger on whoever I'm fighting, so that maybe Tyler will be proud.

"Remember, if it's your first night at Fight Club….You have to fight." He says this and looks straight at Angel Face, a newbie. He's blonde hair and blue eyed-Hitler would have loved him. I know Tyler does. I don't know if I'm angry or sad or just eager to beat the shit out of this kid.  
>I am Jack's raging emotions.<p>

"Ready….fight."  
>Angel Face punches me in the nose and my blood spurts out in different directions. This earns him a whistle from Tyler which makes me sick.<br>Suddenly I'm on top of Angel Face and I'm just hitting him and hitting him, trying to win Tyler back.  
>I finally stop when I see his bloody face.<br>"where'd YOU go psycho boy?" asks Tyler.  
>"I felt like destroying something beautiful."<br>He flinches but recovers in a rapid second.  
>"Get him to a fuckin hospital."<p>

"something on your mind dude?" Tyler asks when we're in the car.  
>"No….Okay yeah. Why wasn't I told about Project Mayhem?"<br>The drones in the back seat state, "The first rule about Project Mayhem is you do not ask questions."  
>I give them a withering look.<br>"What are you talking about?"  
>"Why didn't you include me, in the beginning?"<br>"Fight Club was the beginning. Now it's moved out of the basement, and it's Project Mayhem."  
>I could feel my anger rising.<p>

"You and I started Fight Club, you remember that? It's as much mine as it is yours you know!"  
>Tyler looks at me knowingly. "Is this about you and me?"<br>"Yeah! I thought we were doing this together…"  
>"You're missing the point! This does not belong to us!"<br>"TYLER!" I yell. We almost collide with a car, but he swerves at the last moment.  
>"What do you want!" he yells. "YOU DECIDE YOUR OWN LEVEL OF INVOLVEMENT!"<br>"I WILL! I JUST WANT TO KNOW CERTAIN THINGS FIRST!" I yell back.  
>"The first rule about Project Mayhem is-"<p>

"SHUT. UP!" I say to the drones in the back. Tyler's little monkeys.  
>More quietly, I say to Tyler, "I just….I want to know what you're thinking."<br>"See, this is your problem! Just forget about what you think you know, about life, about friendship, and especially about you and me."  
>"w…what do you mean?"<br>Tyler almost crashes again.  
>"Guys, if you died right now, what's one thing you wish you would have done?"<br>"Paint a self portrait,"  
>"Build a house."<br>He turns to me. "and you?"  
>"Nothing,"<br>He almost crashes again.  
>"I don't know, I wouldn't feel anything good! You happy?"<br>"NOT GOOD ENOUGH."  
>We almost hit a bus.<br>"Fight Club, Marla, I am sick of all your shit!"  
>He smirks at me. "Okay."<br>"No, I'm not done! Fuck you, fuck what we had, If I died right now, I wouldn't care I WOULD BE HAPPY! Because then, I would be FAR FAR AWAY from YOU! Okay? I LOVED you, Tyler, but I guess I wasn't good enough for you OR this stupid shitty Project Mayhem."  
>He stares at me blankly. "Acceptance is one of the key components to not fearing death." He lets go of the wheel.<br>"Fuck you, Tyler!" I grab at the wheel.  
>"NO! Just. Let. Go."<br>I stare at him, hoping the corners of his mouth will turn up and he'll tell me he loves me despite everything. They don't.  
>"Calm as hindu cows, right Tyler?" I hear myself say. But I don't sound like myself.<br>"Hey man, calm down. I do l-"

Screeching.  
>skidding.<br>These are the last things I hear before we crash.  
>I know I'm in pain, but I can only think of one thing: Tyler.<br>He never did finish his sentence.

I finally let go.


	3. Chapter 3

Bliss.  
>Not even that word can sum up how I feel right now, at this moment. I wish I could save this moment forever, just looking at Tyler's beautiful, battered and bloody body and knowing his deep blue eyes are scrutinizing my deep wounds. But I can't.<br>"holy shit….c'mon don't give up. I'm getting you to a hospital. Just remember, don't let you let go, don't you DARE let go."  
>You told me to let go, remember, Tyler? I'm just being an obedient little monkey.<p>

He crawls over and lies down next to me, and suddenly the pain washes over me. It's almost a welcoming feeling though, because that pain blocks the heartache I knew I would feel again. I let out a soft groan.  
>"It's beautiful isn't it? Look at that sky. Those stars. They remind me of your eyes."<br>Don't be silly, Tyler. I'm not beautiful. You are.  
>"Listen to that fire burn. We have accomplished something great tonight."<p>

And what would that be, exactly?  
>His eyes shine as he speaks. "We have achieved Nirvana through pain and letting go. One of life's most important lessons."<br>Okay, Tyler. Okay.

"do you feel that high? It's your adrenaline rushing. It's what I would call bliss. How I feel when…" he trails off.  
>I only feel bliss when Tyler kisses me.<p>

"Is that so?" he says, smirking. The little corners of his mouth turn up as he turns to face me slowly.  
>don't. no.<br>"no?" he asks in a hurt tone.  
>no. don't tease me. Don't hurt me.<br>"but I'd never do anything to hurt you…." And he leans in to softly brush his rough lips against mine. It's everything I wanted and more.  
>I need you, Tyler.<br>"Hey man, I need you too."  
>But our argument, you kinda sorta…<br>He shushes me. "Not now. Let's enjoy this while we can…till someone ruins it. Someone always ruins it. Don't be that someone."

Okay, Tyler. Okay.


	4. Chapter 4

Tyler, where'd you go? I need you!

"I'm right here. Calm down."

I don't know what to do Tyler! Don't let them take me.

"Just repeat after me, monkey.."

Monkey. So we're back to that. Okay, Tyler. Okay.

"Sir, are you even listening to me? This is very serious!" yelled the investigator in the perfectly ironed Calvin Klein suit. Just another slave to the industry.

Tyler's words began to come out of my mouth. Like word vomit.

"Listen to me, _SIR_. _Why_ would I go out and crash my car into someone else's _on purpose_? No reason at all. Now, you don't know who I am or where I've been so let me fill you in: I have a regular 9 to 5 job that frankly, I need to get back to. Are we done here?"

The investigator shuffled nervously and wiped the sweat off his forehead with a dirty handkerchief. He got up and yelled, "You can't talk to me like that! I could put your skinny little white ass in jail!" His breath hit me like napalm. It was probably his lunch.

"On what charge? I haven't done anything wrong. And if you forget, there's a camera up there. So I wouldn't get step out of line if i were you. You don't have enough evidence to arrest me, so I'm only going to ask you once: am I being arrested, or am I free to go?"

The investigator glances at the camera in the corner and wipes some more sweat off of his grimy forehead. "You may leave."

Tyler waits for me outside.

Where to now Tyler?

"I dunno man. What day is it?"

I approach a woman on the street wearing tight cheetah print pants and cheap pink lipstick and ask her what the date is.

It's Thursday. Tyler whistles. "3 days. 3 fuckin days."

But we spent time together, Tyler! I don't care that we wasted 3 days!

Tyler shoves my body into a wall in a dirty alley. "Time _TOGETHER?" _He asks me in a disgusted voice. "Have you forgotten what this is about? What we started?"

No, no of course not. How could I forget?  
>"Let me tell you again: this is <em>not about you and me.<em> This is about taking back what's ours, rewriting history! Those fat cats think they've gotten rid of us but i'll tell you something, Project Mayhem has something cooked up that they won't see coming. And all our little monkeys are going to help. Even Angel Face-I mean Shit Face. He looks like shit ever since you went psycho on him."

Shit face. That's pretty funny. What am I doing?

"Nothing. Just look pretty."

No Tyler, I want to help you.

"You want to help me?"

Of course. I love you.

"You know this is rigged for failure," he says as he smirks his little Tyler smirk at me. He grabs me and throws me on the ground, kicking me as I land. "Don't love me! I thought," He kicks me with every syllable. "I told you this wasn't about us!"

I am Jack's flaming sense of rejection.

Suddenly, he kneels down next to the pool of blood coming from my mouth. He caresses my face. "I'm sorry...You want to help me right? Well here's how."

What are you doing, Tyler?

He rips my shirt off.

No.

Not like this.

He throws me around and punches me before he finally enters me.

"You wanted to help me didn't you?" He asks with every thrust. "You wanted to be a whore? Well I'll treat you like one!"

It hurts a lot. Why are you hurting me Tyler? I thought you loved me.

He finishes and leaves me sprawled, half naked, like a toy that you toss once you're done playing with it.

He spits on me.

"You belong to me. Don't forget that."

I think you need help.

I think I need help.

I'll help us. I promise.


End file.
